From Isolation to Friendship: Meeting Our First Expat in Córdoba

My husband and I have been in Argentina for almost 16 months, and during that time we haven’t really made any friends. It turns out that making friends here has been almost as difficult as finding work. That’s not entirely surprising for one major reason: money is pretty tight. Without cash, we really can’t go anywhere or invite anyone to our house.

On the other hand, the few Argentines I’ve spoken to have had a rather grim view of Americans. A friendly conversation sometimes turns into someone accusing us of being brutal conquerors who think we’re perfect. That’s not who we are, and it’s certainly not what America is about. Zach and I are peaceful, loving, and friendly, and a lot of our friends and family back home are the same way. Okay… most of them are.

By this point, I felt that the only people who could truly understand what we were experiencing were other expats. So I recently reached out to a fellow American living in Córdoba through Facebook. We eventually met for coffee at Patio Olmos and got to know each other.

Her name was Sarah-Claire, and she was originally from Philadelphia. She was also a fellow Doctor Who fan and LGBT-friendly, which I really appreciated.

It was such a relief to speak with another American because, let’s face it, no one understands your situation better than someone who’s going through the same thing. It was wonderful sitting with her over coffee, comparing expat experiences and talking about what our lives were like back home.

We got along so well that she invited my husband and I to her birthday party a few weeks later.

Through Sarah-Claire, I met other people, including an English speaking Argentine named Peque who was super friendly. We also met another American named Brian (not pictured) who was equally nice.

That's me with the glasses

We celebrated Sarah-Claire’s birthday at the Catre Diem Cultural Hostel here in Cordoba City. Zach and I struck conversations with locals, Americans, and expats from other parts of the world as well. 

Afterwards we went to a club called Dorian Gray. The good thing about this club is that it's friendly to all lifestyles. In other words, it's a safe space for straight and gay people.  I’m a bit of a square, so I haven’t really frequented many clubs in my life. In fact, this was my first club experience in Argentina. Before that I went to one club in Manhattan, and another one in South Florida in my early twenties, so that's a total of three clubs in one lifetime. 

When we walked into Dorian Gray, we immediately noticed the bar, but we couldn’t really drink. My husband was taking Neotigason, a medication used to treat his Darier’s Disease. I was also on antidepressants that had recently been prescribed by a psychiatrist at Córdoba’s public hospital to help me cope with homesickness.

Zach's ready to jam!

One unusual thing we noticed in the club’s lobby was a group of actors dressed in tribal-style costumes who were pulling guests aside and getting them to participate in some kind of performance ritual. It was quite interesting.

Then we headed to the dance floor with our expat friend, and her friends, and started dancing. Zach accused me of dancing like a white person. Ha-ha! He’s of Puerto Rican descent, so he’s got dance moves written into his DNA. I on the other hand, only know how to swivel my hips and shuffle my feet. Plus, I suffer from social anxiety, so I was a bit overwhelmed (despite my medication). Nevertheless, I had a great time! More importantly, Zach had a great time. I haven’t seen him this alive in months. 

Speaking to other expats has finally broken the social ice for us here in Córdoba, and I only wish I hadn’t waited 16 months to do it. It not only allowed us to meet people from back home, but it also helped us make friends with English-speaking Argentines who were either friends with, or in relationships with, our fellow expats. But there was also an unexpected perk to connecting with our expat friend.

Finding work is still a challenge in Argentina. Thankfully, Sarah-Claire introduced me to an Australian expat living in Córdoba who hired me as a freelance writer. The experience has been great because I get to do something I love—writing—and get paid for it at the same time. It’s still no substitute for a permanent job, which I hope to land someday, but it’s definitely a step in the right direction.